The new constitutional structure
Scotland is to be confined in a tower under a provision of a Bill designed to save the Union being considered by the House of Lords. A further provision will ensure regular haircuts.
The Bill is the initiative of the Constitutional Reform Group, a group of peers and commoner types led by Robert Gascoyne-Cecil, 7th Marquess of Salisbury and including Lord Lisvane of Tunbridge Wells and Baron Hain of Robben Island. Warning that “the United Kingdom risks disintegration’ their Lordships assure us that “many who have held positions of power and responsibility in United Kingdom institutions” will fight its demise. They propose a new constitutional structure which would ensure its continuation in perpetuity.
A Liberal amendment to the Bill tabled by Emperor Ming of Pittenweem provides for Scotland to be sent to bed without supper until it learns the error of its ways.